Sound Guy Geekism / To be manly or sensitive

This video is the ultimate in sound guy geek fun. You see, I'm a sound guy, and anything to do with audio that combines the following,

1. Great music
2. Principles of Audio demonstrated in an interesting manner
3. and most importantly FIRE

is right up my alley. The video is of a Ruben's Tube which demonstrates standing waves. I want one of these on my wall at home, or even better, sitting on the meter bridge of my console at work. It might annoy the theatre goers a little, and Workplace Health and Safety may have their issues with it, but I think it would make for the ultimate "Pimp my Sound Console" accessory.

 

Manly, or Sensitive

Neil at Citizen of the Month wrote a blog called Strong, Silent Type. He said that he was feeling worried about how he wrote and acted and if it was sufficiently manly and not too sensitive.

I ask myself this question every day. In my head of course, never out loud to actual people (not that anyone reading this isn't an actual person. The Internet anonymity means I can say what I like here).

I've never known exactly how manly or sensitive was expected in general society. I tend to follow the crowd and play along at whatever level is required. With "The Boys" I am rude, crude, often quite sexist, and generally a "Man", whatever that means. Around women I try to be sensitive. They are the easy going, emotionally secure, and open minded people in my life, who can handle me baring my soul and not judge or laugh at me.

But where is the line drawn in relationships with the opposite sex. I hear multitudes of varied opinions on what women want in a partner. The abridged list is something like this (in no particular order)

• Strength
• Sense of humour
• Easygoing
• Sensitivity
• a Good body
• a Good job
• etc

I could keep typing for days (to be honest I'm probably too tired to think of any more so I'll let the reader fill in the list).

The line seems to move every day. One day she wants strong and macho, the next it's funny, and then sensitive. All without the benefits of an expert commentator to inform us what the "Play of the Day" is meant to be. 

I like to think that I can read people quite quickly. Give me 10 minutes of conversation with someone and I can generally pick what type of person they are behind the facade that they present to the world. I just can't do that with women I care about, and as a result I never know what's coming next.

I've been blindsided during a joke and told I'm not sensitive enough and am always making light of important things. I play the strong, silent type and I'm not involving myself in conversations of any emotional significance.  I try and connect on an emotional level and get brushed off.

I'm just wandering along unsure of what to do next, how to act, what to say, and there is a standard that says I am the man and don't deserve to be told.

Men - Ever been told "If you don't know, I'm not telling you" ?

Women - Ever said that?

That's me every single day. I wander around asking "What?, How?, Why?, When? Where?" and I get nothing back because she "isn't telling me".  I can only guess most of the time, and I guess badly more often than I get it right.

So, from now on I expect new standards. If you don't tell me, I won't care if I know it. I can't waste time trying every play in the book only to be told I'm playing the wrong game. I'm just tired of it.

 

Labels: life, audio, geek, relationships

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